A little shameless promotion

As you may or may not know, I am heavily involved with the Junior League of Cleveland. For those of you who are unfamiliar with the organization we are basically a women's organization, nearing our centennial, who's primary focus is to help enrich the lives of Clevelanders through philanthropy and more importantly various key community projects that help some of the neediest citizens in Cleveland.

There are many ways in which we contribute to Cleveland, whether it be through helping restore the Playhouse Theatre, saving it from demolition, facilitating Healthy Kids initiatives at the Cleveland Children's Museum or volunteering at Huron Hospital's Storks Nest, the Junior League of Cleveland is an integral part of the community.

The Junior League of Cleveland currently has two initiatives that can benefit from the participation of everyone in the community.

The first is the annual fundraiser. This fundraiser helps support not only the Junior League but also helps fund the various initiatives we participate in throughout the Greater Cleveland Area. This year, the second annual event will be held May 7, 2010 at the Shoreby Club in Bratenahl from 6-11 p.m. There will be gaming tables, racing, silent auction and a wine raffle.

For more event information and tickets please visit: http://bit.ly/JLC_fundraiser. Tickets are $45 through the end of February and go up $5 each month so buy them early!

The other amazing initiative that needs immediate help and is of no cost. The Saturday Morning Tutoring Program NEEDS your help

Every Saturday, over 100 Cleveland area students, grades K-12, are in need of tutoring. While dozens of tutors are available each Sunday, there are never enough to match the demand of the students. You need NO experience, just a willingness to help out the wonderful children of Cleveland. If you have never tutored before, all it takes is a 45 min. on-the-job training and you are ready to go. I promise it is an extremely rewarding and fun experience!

The tutoring takes place every Saturday from 10a-12p at Church of the Covenant on Euclid in University Circle.

For more information please visit: http://tutor_me.tripod.com/

You do not need to RSVP ahead of time, just show up.

For information on anything I outlined above please drop me a line. I am passionate about improving Cleveland and know you are too!

Friends Are the Greatest

Sometimes people know just what you need and when. I referenced it in a previous post, but somehow friends just have a way of knowing and offering a shread of goodwill that goes a long way. A call. A card or a well timed haiku.

A great girlfriend created this haiku for me and I just love it:

Tattooed Female
With More Smarts than Average
Folk Boys Heart Sassy Kate

Appreciate your friends. Call them out of the blue. Send a card, a postcard or even an email. You will certainly make someone's day and what is better than telling someone you care (even just a little).

I need to work on my apathy

What's the true test of character? It's how one reacts in situations that are uncomfortable. Where you may be mad, sad, apathetic or whatever the reaction, will you hold your head high or feed into a negative reaction? I need to work on my reactions when I'm hurt. I shut myself in and don't do well hiding my emotions, rather they seem to radiate outwards as anger. It's easier to be angry than address hurt/sadness, which I why I don't just settle with anger and am generally never angry. Bothered with something? Sure, but not angry.
It is easy for me to forgive and evaluate a situation but sometimes all it takes is a fleeting comment or end of the night goodbye to bring the angst back up to the surface and become a weak individual. I hate weakness and it bothers me that my emotions have the ability to dismantle me in an instant.

What amazes me is just when you're unsure what to do, say or feel you reach out to the right person who offers the perfect response. Life is so bizarrely rad.

pay cuts and budgets

I was laid off in July of 2009. It was the best and worst thing that could have happened to me.

It was the worst thing ever because it was a blow to the gut. My boss was missing in action from my professional life for a few days, no one could tell me where he was. Our last few 1-on1's had been cancelled. He elected to let me go Over. The. Phone. From another state. He told me the department was going in a direction and I no longer fit into that vision. It was the worst because it was an abandonment of my 11 team members, each one I cared about deeply and was 100% vested in their job satisfaction and success. It hurt that I invested almost 5 years of my life and career and it was all gone in one day, at 7:45 in the morning (at least my boss, two hours behind out West had to get up REALLY early to fire me from behind a phone), with what felt like nothing to show for it but the few bags of possessions; along with tears I tried so very hard to hide, and damn, as I write this, it still hurts. It turned my life upside down, but hey, that is life. Get Bitter or Get Better (thanks to my absolute favorite Senior Vice President of HR who used that as her mantra).

It was the best because I felt stagnant. I no longer felt my boss was supporting me. I was and still am not a 'Yes Man'. I have my own opinions and want to use mind share to improve performance not only for myself but for the people I (did) manage. I was no longer allowed to do that. I also got my entire summer off, free and clear to enjoy a wonderfully sunny and glorious few months all to myself and Kiera (the orange furry gal who truly runs this house). I went home to Minnesota, visited Chicago and DC. I even went sky diving in PA.What truly blessed me about the layoff was it forced me to eventually reevaluate what I am looking to do and where I want to be in life. Every decision and every scenario allows someone to start over. As a manager, one of my perks, if you will, was the ability to reset expectations at any time. We are all in control of our own decisions and actions, and the layoff was my chance to reset my own personal expectations and use it as a chance to grow.

So, I did that. I took a hard look at myself. I threw around a lot of ideas to get out, move around. Then I got scared and stayed within the safety of what I already know. Luckily, with a well placed connection I secured a new job in September...with a significant pay cut; but hey, it is a job in an economy that isn't exactly booming. It allowed me to pursue a masters degree in Management (one of my true passions) free of charge. It motivated me to utilize the free year of career coaching available to me as a perk of my layoff. So I utilized my summer to live in a tanned, relaxed haze of travel, friends, books and exercise.

Reality has officially set in. That pay cut I mentioned? It has put a ginormous damper on my budget...i.e. I have never had one and just this past weekend embarked on said endeavor. I found out after taxes and health insurance, I am bringing home under $25,000. Hard reality to face. I have no idea how anyone, let alone families, lives off what seems like pennies. At the same time, clearly I have expenses that must be cut. It. Is. Hard. I have to reign in everything. AARGH. Eating out? Basically gone (I can't eradicate this one because I LOVE trying new foods and restaurants). A night out with people? Who am I kidding, only if I spend under $15. It shouldn't be hard, but I trained myself to enjoy what a life of excess has to offer. One of my 2010 goals was to get debt free outside of standard expenses (car loan, school). Turns out debt really does not fit into a budget. So what is a gal to do? My taxes. It's officially tax season, mine are almost done, just have to send it in. All but about $300 will go to paying off my credit card. I am so happy that it will be gone, but so sad I even allowed myself to get into debt. The lesson? Nothing is guaranteed. Nothing is permanent. We are all in control of our own actions and decisions. It took my life taking a 180 to fully realize that change is inevitable and while these lessons are hard, and frankly shitty, I know that even if I don't know exactly where I want to be, I am already a better person for it and can confidently say 2010 is the year of refocus and reinvention.